How To Date Casually Without Hurting Anyone


This is great for people who are terrible at long-term things or just not ready for a new one. If you’ve too recently been in a relationship that lasted long and ended amicably enough that you still go fishing with your ex’s brother—or keep forgetting that farting audibly in front of a date is unacceptable—this is probably a good way to test the water and get back out there. It’s best not to jump into anything serious too quickly after the kind of devastation that leaves you that gassy afterwards, anyways. But now that you’re considering dating again (sort of), let’s figure out how to do so tactfully, shall we? The thing is, lots of people think “dating casually” and its inherent lack of a commitment means they can be psychopathically insensitive to the feelings of others (woo!). This is not a good look. Don’t do it.

The reason that casual dating is so hard for many people is because, well, isn’t the whole point of first, second, or third dates that they’re casual? Generally, there are two types of casual daters: Those who are potentially interested in something more but open to going with the flow at the start, and those who aren’t looking for anything past what you’re doing right now. The former might fuck up by assuming that “casual” means “easily disposable,” while the latter could fuck up by failing to communicate that they really, truly, don’t want anything serious.

Sometimes, the latter are commitment phobic or delusional. (No, Scarlett Johannson is not just moments away from coming to her senses and dating you. Yes, you should consider dating the perfectly lovely social-media manager in tasteful separates.) Other times, they are just clueless about what this entails. For how simple it should be, there are many ways to accidentally fuck up this process and blow your chance at more blow jobs or, even worse, realize too late that she was Your Person. Luckily for you, the more egregious mistakes mostly fall into three major categories that I‘ll discuss below. Don’t worry: If it doesn’t work out after all that, we’ll get to how to end casual relationships without being a pile of sentient diarrhea.

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