ES: The Internet alone is a big nail in that coffin.
IT: It’s the nail. Because of the Internet, women don’t need nobody. Yeah, it’s a sad thing, but pimps are becoming ancient history. Like preachers. I always compare pimps to preachers.
ES: In what way?
IT: They wear alligator shoes, flashy suits, diamond rings, drive Cadillacs. And they sell you something you don’t need. The preacher says, “I know God a little bit better than you. If you pay me, I’ll hook you up.”
ES: Holy shit.
IT: Am I wrong?
ES: You’re not wrong at all. I’ve just never made that connection before.
IT: The Pope is a pimp. He’s like, “I know Him a little bit better. I have a better connection. Pay me and I’ll get you hooked in better.” It’s pimpin’!
ES: Sweet gentle Jesus. The Pope is a pimp.
IT: He wears that hat.
ES: He’s got the clothes. Nothing about a Pope costume is subtle.
IT: He lives in a big house. He carries a lot of jewelry. Right? The Pope has the most jewels of anybody in Italy, right? He’s got the big crib, rides around in a Pope Mobile. And his job title starts with a “P.”
ES: Stop it, Ice. You’re going to bring down the Catholic Church.
IT: But here’s the thing people don’t always realize: If you want God, you don’t need connections. You don’t need a pimp. If you believe and you are spiritually connected, why you got to pay the middle man?
ES: Who needs a pimp?
IT: Who needs a pimp? We give all this money to the church. Does that get you to heaven quicker?
ES: Probably not.
IT: And yet we believe it. That’s pimpin’, man. Trust me. The Pope is a pimp.
Read more: Ice T Interview – Ice T on Pimping and the Pope – Esquire Follow us: @Esquiremag on Twitter | Esquire on Facebook Visit us at Esquire.com