We asked financial expert Jacquette Timmons, president and CEO of Sterling Investment Management and author of the book Financial Intimacy ($11, Chicago Review Press), to tell us how to keep it together when our financial world (and potentially our relationship) begins to fall apart.
1. Stop the hemorrhaging. Discover where the money leaks are occurring. Take a close look at your expenses and detect what you can cut out. “The first thing is to put a halt to any unnecessary spending,” says Timmons. “And that is for the purpose of getting into a new rhythm. Because for however long you’ve been married and both parties have been working, you have a pattern that is predicated on the inflow of two income streams. So now that you only have one, you’re going to have to halt what you’ve been currently doing so you can get a sense of what it feels like to meet your obligations on either one salary or a significantly reduced one.”
2. Add income. On the other hand, particularly in the case where one spouse was laid off, it will be important to make an effort to replace the lost income. Often, cutting back isn’t enough. Even if it means one of you has to work at a job that you feel is below your skill level, do what you can to bring in extra cash.
3. Don’t play the blame game. Now is not the time to blame each other for your financial woes. Pull together and work as a team. Fighting and blaming each other will just create more tension and hamper the process.